Death Does Not Always Accompany A Broken Heart. (RQ)

Diamiss from Unknown asks,
“What can I do at this point of no return? My boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me and even though I still love him, I know he is not the same. It feels like we are still who we’ve always been and now we are enemies. That is what it feels like. I know I love him and I will still like to make it work. Is he still worth pursuing? He says we should just be friends. He says he no longer sees me as his girlfriend and sees me more like a sister. How can he see me as his sister when we have been f******  many times!!!? WTF!! I have so many questions, I really hope you can help! I would truly like to know should I move on, how and why? He acts like a different person towards me now and it hurts. Is this break up for the best?”

“One minute we are f****** and the next minute he is cold and very distant and don’t want to spend time with me. He wasn’t busy and he didn’t have a job at the time. And all of a sudden he goes back to school and gets a job and now he don’t want me even though I was there for him when he had nothing. He wants bigger and better things i guess. How did we go from being so passionate with each other to now living without each other? My heart is broken, how can I go on? I hope there is more to life than just broken hearts then death! I hope this is enough information to help you understand where I am coming from?”

Well Diamiss, you do have a lot questions, haha. Thank you very much for trusting me with this topic. A topic that is very sensitive for many people. Before going any further, I would like to remind you that I am not a licensed therapist, counselor nor am I an expert. All my advice comes from my own personal thoughts, opinions, and experiences. Also, keep in mind that this is your life. It does not matter what I or what anyone else thinks. At the end of the day, you are the one who has to live with the choices YOU make, not I. With that being said, I will do my best to answer, and I pray this advice helps you.

To answer what I think is the over all question, I say, you should move on with your life. He has and so should you. If I am reading your words correctly, it appears that perhaps your ex checked out of the relationship way before he said anything to you. He worked on himself and now its time for you to do or continue doing the same. Now, allow me to elaborate. 

Being transparent here, truthfully, your situations hits home for me. This is very similar to my former relationship, so I think I completely understand where you are coming from. My ex told me he thought we should just be friends. He revealed that he loves me but perhaps that love is different, implying he has love for me but is no longer in love with me. Again, I am not an expert but perhaps hearing a bit of my story can help you.

Love and Hip Hop Atlanta (You can always get something positive out of what you watch!)

Let’s admit it! Reality Television is now the “new” art of “great tv”. I use these quotations very loosely to indicate that these are things I have heard said and I may be adding a hint of sarcasm behind the phrases because these topics can be and most likely will be debated. There is no denying how fast one can get sucked into such shows, myself included. I got into reality television when I was going through my first year of college. I was constantly stressed with work, school, and human beings, but I didn’t want to smoke, drink or get high so I would sit alone in my room and watch shows like The Real Housewives franchise, (Atlanta and New Jersey are my favorite thus far!)The I Love New York reruns (I didn’t watch it when it actually aired), Flava of Love reruns (Didn’t watch it when it aired), Daisy of Love reruns (I actually watched it when it aired but I really enjoy watching the reruns for some reason) …shows like that… I watched these shows as an escape from what my life was actually like. I didn’t want to read because I had enough assignments that required reading and I wasn’t as active with people because I got enough of people in class and at rehearsals. One reality show that I can not stop watching is Love and Hip Hop! I started watching since the very first season of Love and Hip Hop New York and I was front row and center…in front of the television when Love and Hip Hop Atlanta premiered, so I am not new to these shows by far. I favored the Atlanta series not only because Atlanta is about an hour and a half drive from where I live, but also because of the drama that took place in the FIRST EPISODE! Why I continue to watch? Because unlike the New York branch, the Atlanta crew cast remains some what the same which allows the cast to grow on you. You learn so much about these people instead of being left in the dark about what are they doing now, or what happened? By keeping the core of the cast, this gives you hope for something, ANYTHING, to resolve and grow.  Due to the fact that the show seems to reek of pure drama and scandal, I can understand why many people deem this type of show as a waste of time and a poor representation of the Atlanta Rap/Hip Hop music industry. Though I understand and respect this opinion, I also have a few disagreements and counter points to explain. I will use the Atlanta crew as my examples, Mimi Faust in particular.